Azamra for Everyone Part 4

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Why are we asked to make a judgment at all, positive or negative? Why does HS arrange for us to “stand in judgment” of each other?

Uh, oh. I now realize that I pretty much condemn others all the time—kind of like a negative tape loop running in my brain. What can I do to stop?

*If a person qualifies as a rodef, a pursuer of life (attempted murderer) we do not pause to look for the good in him. We are required to rescue the victim and do what it takes to stop the rodef. What about when the situation is not so clear cut? For example, what if a rodef is trying to harm someone else on a spiritual level? What are our obligations then? In situations like this, if it seems unclear, we ask a Rav. If a Rav isn’t available, we keep in mind and do our best to protect a soul as we would a body.

Azamra: The 7 Habits of Highly Connective People

We’ll continue with two questions from the last post:

Why are we asked to make a judgment at all, positive or negative, about others? Why does Hashem arrange for us to “stand in judgment” of each other?

Rebbe Nachman tells us that everything that we see, hear, and experience as we live each day contributes to our spiritual growth. What we see or hear concerning other people is no exception.

The holy Baal Shem Tov said that, “Before a Heavenly decree is passed against a person, the person himself whom the decree concerns is asked about it.”*

If the person who is facing the Heavenly judgment agrees with the Heavenly court that the decree should be passed—it is passed. In other words, our own “ruling” determines what happens; our own judgment about our actions decides the consequences we must face.

But Nobody Asked Me. Or Did They?

Now, if you’re like most people, you probably don’t recall ever being asked for your opinions about these lofty proceedings. But, says the Baal Shem Tov, though you may not be aware of this adjudication, you have indeed been asked.

Every time you are given the opportunity to pass judgment on another, know that it is actually your own actions you are judging. The other person’s actions might be obviously similar to your own, or they may be related in ways you find difficult to fathom. You might read about them in the newspaper, you might hear about them from a friend, or you might be a witness.

You may feel annoyed, upset, or angry with the person or you may simply feel an urge to condemn them. If you do, you condemn yourself in the chambers of the Heavenly Courts, says Chassidus. However, if you are able to squelch the desire to adjudge, attack, or accuse; if you reach deep into your heart to be dan l’chaf zchut; if you are able to turn away from the negative and seek and find only the good points in that person, then the positive judgment you pass is on yourself.

We instinctively know this to be true, which is why we admire non-judgmental people, people who are accepting of others, people who are able to see the good in others. On the other hand, those who give into their urge to pass sentence on others, tend to be really hard on themselves, if not openly, at least deep down inside. Arrogance or hypocrisy are often covering up real fear or shame.

Uh, oh. I now realize that I pretty much condemn others all the time—kind of like a negative tape loop running in my brain. What can I do to stop?

It sometimes feels like it isn’t possible to look for the good in others, it requires too much effort. Expressing negative judgment, whether through open condemnation or snide remarks, can easily become habitual. (After all, snarkyism is everyday fare in the predominant cultural media.) Besides, even if we manage to control our mouths, we might really harbor hatred in our minds and hearts.

Let’s say we’re good to go—we can give our fellows a pass. Still, it’s possible to feel able to give a pass to everyone except one particular person.  You know who he (or she) is.  You think, “Okay, I can look for the good in everybody, except fill-in-the-blank. They are simply too… annoying, disgusting, haughty, rude, unkind, etc. No one could find anything good about them.”

Remember, that one person is US. If we pass judgment, it’s still our court case, our decree. We might possibly be forfeiting our own acquittal.